A dilemma...

6:59 AM

Recently I have found that blog hopping really gets more visitors to my site... I've made some really good friends, thanks to all the wonderful hops... I was rather hoping you guys help me find an answer to it...

Right now I'm facing a dilemma. I have got a proposal for a large project here in Sangli - An architectural project. Its an once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. The pay might not be great. But this project will surely get me settled as an architect in Sangli.

Now whats the dilemma? To do it or not to do it. But why would I feel not to do it?

Here are my reasons :
1. Kiddo does not have anyone to look after him when he's at home. No day care / no nanny / no reliable baby sitter. My MIL stays on the first floor of the same house, but she is working and I cannot really depend on her.

2. Whenever I have got work pressure, I tend to neglect home, which in turn makes hubby mad and then we have rows... He does not like me ignoring kiddo (Like i love doing that).

3. After having a really bad beginning here in Sangli I'm honestly a little scared to start with something this big! I'll update you on the history. I had a great practice going in Satara - my hometown. But after marriage I shifted to my husband's place - Sangli. I started my own office here. (afterall I had completed about 16 projects before). But I waited for an year and still did not have a single project. I closed down the shutters and started a job. That year was very taxing for me. I have spent hours in my office playing Solitaire on my PC.

If this opportunity had come at that time, I'd have jumped at it. But after 5 years of not doing my own practice, when this came along, I was seriously thinking about it.

4. If I fail at this - and mind well, I'll have to do everything on my own - I have a very supportive family!(not that they dont want to, but I know they cannot - they're all too tied up)- I dont think I'll do any kind of 'work' again. At times it will also mean disturbing the peace on the home front.

Hubby and I have been through rough times recently. But in the end we realized we both love eahc other too much to let go. We know we will always be togetehr, no matter what. But then, is it all worth it? Would I really get the pleasure of working when I'm not happy at home? Will I get satisfaction from it if I know kiddo is missing me badly?

I'm so confused. Its like someeone has given you an ice-cream just after you've recovered from a bad cold! To eat or not to eat?

What do you guys think I should do?

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Thank you for your comments... I try to reply to all of them personally, but sometimes life is just too fast to do that... But I love hearing from you...